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  • Writer's picturehopecaitlins

Moving on and letting go...

I remember in the beginning how I felt. I was alone, confused and ashamed, I didn't know what was happening to me or who I was anymore. So many people made me feel as if my illness was something I should be ashamed of and that being comfortable with myself and my condition was wrong. But I remember when I began to find myself again, through my photography and putting myself in front of the camera. I forced myself to accept who I was now, rather than the person I'd long since left behind. I began to remember the story books my dad read to me as a child, the way the characters formed a pathway in my mind. They were never given a normal life or a easy path, they inspired me with courage and strength and I remembered the promise I made to myself as a child, to never be normal! I guess I didn't expect my life to turn out quite like this! Taking a photo of myself in my wheelchair is another step to setting myself free from the constant pain of battling my body, mind and the harshness of the world around me. I'm finishing school and I'm not going to go to prom as I thought I would but what I am going to do is say goodbye, to the pain and sadness but to all the wonderful moments as well, each representing a part of my self that has helped me come to a point of feeling okay, because feeling okay in yourself is enough to make you elated with joy ♡

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